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A long time ago, in a galaxy far far away…

A long time ago, in a galaxy far far away… This is how most epic stories begin, so my youth tells me, and so I thought it only right to start my epic review of the Alpha Male 3 Stimulator from MEO in a similar manner.

The Alpha Male 3 is an eight-and-three quarter inch C-shaped piece of stainless steel awesomeness. With ball-shaped ends sized around one-inch at the small end and around one-and-three-quarter inches at the large end, and weighing in at practically one whole kilo, this is a serious toy. I have long lusted after the Njoy wand that the Alpha Male 3 takes its inspiration from, but that want has now departed.

The manufacturing on this piece of stainless steel is top-notch, but that comes as no real surprise, since everything I’ve had from MEO has been of the toppest most quality. Silver, shiny, heavy – the Alpha Male 3 really is a thing of beauty.

Step away from that beauty for a moment, get it greased up (I used the MEO EZ2Fuck lube), and let’s see if it’s actually any good.

I’m one of those guys who prefers his prostate stimulation of the non-vibrating type – I’ve had great success in the past with metal anal toys – so I have high expectations for the Alpha Male 3.

Starting with the smaller end, it is an absolute doddle to insert. Stainless steel is by its very nature non-draggy, so the addition of lube lets it slip in with absolute ease, although you may want to pause to enjoy the temperature sensations on the sensitive skin around your bumhole. The shaft, with a girth around two thirds of an inch, sits between your sphincter with great comfort, leaving you to concentrate on locating that P-spot.

Now, I don’t know if my prostate possesses marvellous magnetic magic properties, but the Alpha Male 3 was drawn to my P-spot. It connected with it immediately, and I’m sure the clunk I heard was actually myself gasping at the immediate and intense stimulation.

So maybe you don’t need to concentrate on locating that P-spot, since the Alpha Male 3 stimulator does it for you. The weight of the dildo just presses and pleases – it’s a simple piece of prostate pleasure.

My preferred posture is laying on my side, knees up, almost foetal-like. In this position, the weight of the dildo causes it migrate to the side, but a little lateral movement soon brings it back on track. Just laying there with it pressing on my prostate, my breathing shortened, I could tell that this was going to be one hell of a ride.

Grabbing the end of the dildo, I increased the pressure by pulling up on the dildo, my butthole acting as a fulcrum. Holy shizzles, I nearly hit the ceiling – seriously it’s as if the Alpha Male 3 stimulator was made for my anatomy. Once I had calmed down from this intense sensation, I was able to concentrate and actually massage my P-spot. Using small back/forward motions, increasing and decreasing the pressure, it wasn’t long before my cock started to leak that watery pre-cum type liquid that I associate with prostate play.

For me, sometimes prostate stimulation results in an erection, sometimes not. This first use did not – but I don’t really care, since the feelings were so strong that nothing penile could match it. After a short while, I began little thrusts in place of the rocking motion, and almost immediately I felt a warm tingling moving outward from my prostate, engulfing my groin, and radiating up my back and down my hamstrings.

The sensations were so enormous that I found it difficult to maintain the nuanced thrusting, and found myself instead performing haphazard jerks. This just had the effect of driving my impending prostate orgasm forward, and just a second or two later, I was overcome by the white light of a deep deep prostate orgasm that lasted for almost 40 seconds. Still no erection, but plenty of mess.

I love the Alpha Male 3 Stimulator, it just does it for me, no questions. Each and every time I use it I just get super messy, mega intensive prostate orgasms. It can have me on my knees in a matter of a few minutes, or it can string me out for a mindblowing long session.

I have progressed from the small end, to the large end now, with equally as explosive results, and although it can be challenging getting it in, it adds a little something extra. The best way I’ve found for inserting the large end, is to start with the small. If I pop the small end in and out a few times, which in itself is massively pleasing, and I find that it helps me ease the larger end in when I am ready.

And that little something extra? Well, that comes after orgasm, the stretch and pop upon extraction, post orgasm is exquisite, and makes using the larger end worthwhile in itself. Since, for me, I can’t really notice much difference between the large and small ends for prostate stimulation. The Alpha Male 3 is just so damn good at finding my spot, that it doesn’t matter if I go large or small.

And what is really really brilliant, is that afterwards, since it’s made from such a lovely material, cleaning it is so incredibly simple, although sometimes I feel like my legs aren’t strong enough to carry it to the bathroom.

After having a few (loads) of goes with it myself, I introduced M to The Alpha Male 3 Stimulator – in the name of science, we wanted to see if it could also stimulate the Alpha Female.

M is just as much a fan of chilled dildos as I am. So, having hidden the dildo on the windowsill (it’s November!), it was suitably chilled when, mid-session, I grabbed it and said how about this?

Her eyes lit up, which as all I needed to continue. Making sure to lube it up well, I placed the smaller ball at the entrance to her vagina and pushed it slowly in. She drew her breath at the coldness, and helped me position it so the ball was sitting in the right place. Using a back/forward rocking motion on the dildo, kind of like a seesaw, she was soon enjoying some direct G-spot rubbing.

Trying a number of different simulation methods, the smaller ball of the Alpha Male 3 stimulator was able to take her quite far towards an orgasm. She didn’t like the side-to-side so much, found thrusting in a normal dildo manner a little bit bone bumping. It definitely pays to be gentle with the thrusting with this. She did however absolutely love the pressure on her G-spot, and the forward/back swaying motion, which I knew she would.

With the near orgasmic state she was in, and with the feedback she was giving me on what she liked, I just knew she had to have the bigger ball inside her. She was a little nervous, but I pointed it out that it was only really like having 3 of my fingers inside her, and well, she loves that.

So, with a bit more lube, we tried the larger end. The effect was immediate – it instantly pushed her over the edge, into the type of orgasm where she needed to grab hold of something and squeeze. That something happened to be my arm and geez does she have a firm grip.

When the orgasm had ebbed away, I tried the rocking technique she had loved from the smaller ball. Immediately she came again, twice. Lots of body thrashing and panting and OMGs, I carried on with the rocking technique through them all.

It seemed where the Alpha Male 3 stimulator had an inherent way of finding my prostate, so too with finding M’s G-spot. Little to no effort is required to produce some absolutely awesome orgasms.

M loves the way the large end feels so full. This is its secret, I think, for M, the size of that large ball is just so perfect – it hits her G-spot, her AFE-zone, her cervix and everywhere else all at the same time and to such wow results. The fact the balls are seamless with the shaft of the dildo on one side, but decidedly hooked on the other is, I think, key to the efficacy of the Alpha Male 3 stimulator.

And yes, it has elicited that most sought after of all orgasmic delights – the female ejaculate. Our poor sheets.



So, Alpha Male 3 Stimulator, there’s gonna be proper fights over this one, and given the Dynamic of our sexual relationship, I can only see one winner.

• 8 out of 8 people found this review useful.